


in the autumn (and the distance between us)

by lyikisa



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-03
Updated: 2016-07-03
Packaged: 2018-07-19 19:18:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7374151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lyikisa/pseuds/lyikisa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuroo is always one step ahead, until they walk together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	in the autumn (and the distance between us)

 

_Kenma is always two steps behind Kuroo._

_Kuroo making a path and leads him towards life, acting as Kenma's personal guide. It's been like this since as long as Kenma can remember._

_There are times he catches up as Kuroo slows down a tiny bit._

_But of course, times he can't see him at all._

...

 

"Will you wait for me?" Kenma's timid voice peaks out, eyes begging for attention. Kuroo is headed for middle school, and a year difference makes it harder than it should be. 

 

Kuroo looks down and flashes him a grin. "Of course! I always will." 

Kenma feels more reassured. 

 

Although, deep down in his heart.. 

 

 

                               .. _he knows it a lie._

 

* * *

 

 

It's no secret that Kenma wasn't very athletic in the first place. 

 

It's embarrassing really.

 

He sees Kuroo and the others running laps effortlessly far in front of him, without breaking a sweat.

And here is Kenma, panting, sweating at the back trying hard to keep up with the team. 

 

"Hey! We're going ahead!" Kuroo calls out to Kenma as the rest of the team goes farther ahead. 

 

"Right!" Lev answers back. 

 

_no.. please wait for me_

 

"You can go ahead too." 

 

"No, I have to work hard to match you, Kenma-san!" 

 

 

At times he meets new people on his path, even if Kuroo wasn't in sight. 

 

Lev is nice, cheerful.. annoying at times but his company is appreciated.

However, there was longing for a certain black-haired man, lingering in the back of his mind. 

 

Kenma waves the feeling away. 

 

... 

 

"..Kuro," Kenma whines softly, as his tiny legs struggled to keep up with the other boy. "Slow down." 

Kuroo stops and turned behind him and smiled sheepishly.

 

The seven-year-old boy rubbed his neck in embarrassment, "Sorry Kenma!"

 

He walks over to him and takes his small hands into Kuroo's slightly larger ones as they both walked home from the park. 

 

"Mama is making salted mackerel pike tonight, I can't wait to get home." Kuroo was salivating and Kenma gave him a soft smile. 

 

In the autumn where leaves were glowing orange and red, their flushed cheeks turning red from the chills, Kenma could only think about the endearing heat of Kuroo small hands holding his own. 

It was nice, finally catching up to him.

 

Not one step behind, not two steps ahead.

 

But just.. there.  

 

               It feels,  

                              _perfect._

 

* * *

 

 

_Kenma is always two steps behind Kuroo._

Kuroo making a path and leads him towards life, acting as Kenma's _personal guide. It's been like this since as long as Kenma can remember._

_There are times he catches up as Kuroo slows down a tiny bit._

_But of course, times he can't see him at all._

 

...

 

Kuroo is off to university.

 

And Kenma thinks maybe he'll wait for him.

 

After all, the distance between them is gradually decreasing.

Kenma catches up and he finds himself outside Kuroo's university a year later.

 

But he doesn't see him.

 

He.. is not here.

 

 

The year Kenma enters university is the year Kuroo decides to study abroad. 

 

 

The distance between them has never been this much before. 

 

 ... 

 

They loose contact. 

 

And Kenma is just a person who will pop up in his mind when someone asks Kuroo how his childhood was like. 

Kenma is just a memory to him. 

 

No significant role whatsoever. 

 

After college, Kenma took small jobs here and there until he landed as a magazine editor in Nataga Modelling Agency.

There is where he met Akaashi once again, and the two shared an apartment together not far from the job. 

 

Akaashi was the photographer in the well-known Agency. He also shared to Kenma how he and Bokuto had been a thing from high school to college. There they decided to break things off as Bokuto (with Kuroo) went overseas to become a professional athlete.

 

"How is he doing now?" 

 

Akaashi looked down and shrugged. "I haven't heard from him since." 

 

And Kenma, being the one who was able to read people so easily, sees despair and longing in his green iris'. 

 

In the autumn where leaves were glowing orange and red, Kenma and Akaashi are cozy inside, sipping their hot chocolate topped with whip cream and cinnamon. As their eyes stare intently at the television screen. Japan vs Uk's volleyball tournament was on, and they smile sadly at the repeated shouts of 'Hey hey hey' that was missing an 'Akaashi' and the mischievous smile etched on a bedheaded dork. 

Kenma sees the tears streaming down the other man as he furiously wipes them away. 

 

            _"I miss you Bokuto-san"_

 

Kenma's gaze shifted from Akaashi and to the television once again.

           Just in time to see a close up on a certain middle blocker. 

 

His heart ached painfully. 

 

_( Japan won. )_

 

* * *

 

 "Are you sure you want to do this Akaashi?" 

Kenma looked up at the photographer and fiddled with his scarf. 

 

"It's been years." 

 

Akaashi bit his lip and sighed. 

 

"Just this once, and we can leave after." Kenma may or may not have told him about his feelings about a certain individual. 

 

 

The two were over in the China for a small business program, and coincidentally the same time Japan vs China will take place,

 

Kenma nodded and walked into the tournament hall, where Japan vs China's volleyball match will soon take place. 

 

It was a tough fight.

Kenma was clutching on the railings with anticipation coursing through his veins, wide golden eyes analyzing the competitors. 

Volleyballs slamming forcefully onto the ground, the loud cheers from the crowd. 

 

That's what makes a match so wonderful. 

 

And they win. 

Kenma hasn't touched a volleyball in years and then and there does he realise the impact it has done in his life. The adrenaline of a slam dunk, the constant yelling of  'don't mind', 'nice receive'.

It is sentimental really.

 

He sees the famous setter on the team, Oikawa Tooru, embracing the Seijou wing spiker Kenma played against in his high school days.

 

 

Kenma gives a soft smile as he catches Kuroo yelling in victory. He has grown taller, his hair was a mess as usual but that's what makes him.. Kuroo.

And after six years, the distance is finally this short. 

 

He.. 

 

              is right.. 

 

_there._

 

Kenma is so close. But he stops himself. 

 

"Akaashi lets g-"

 

Akaashi has on the biggest smile he has ever seen on him.

Until of course, 

 

 _"So Bokuto-san, is there a certain someone in your life? Being Japan's well-known wing_ spiker _and all?" The interviewer asked cautiously._

_"Of Course! I'm planning to propose soon and -"_

 

They run out. 

 

Akaashi breaks down into sobs. 

 

* * *

  

  _"What about you, Kuroo-san? How is your life on the romantic side?"_

_"Well.."_

 

* * *

_Japan lost against America._

 

_and that's it._

 

_Life goes on._

 

_..._

 

Seasons past and only in the autumn, do they meet again. 

Branches so bare that Kenma could have counted the leaves on each and every one he passed by. The trees were skirted by pools of autumn gold and rust coloured leaves. Leaves took the air in an elegant dance as the chilly wind blew.  

Kenma had on a cosy oversized sweater, his hair clipped to the side and a small ponytail. He had his messy bangs free, framing his face, acting like a curtain from the world. He had bleached his hair not long ago, although his roots were starting to show it wasn't as bad as compared to when he was still in high school.

In his hands was a flyer for an upcoming release of the new game he has been so excited for the past few weeks. 

"Maybe I'll ask Akaashi to accompany me." Kenma thinks out loud as he unlocked the door into his apartment. 

 

The flat was silent as per usual and Kenma paid no mind to it. He slipped off his shoes and with his eyes still trained to the flyer he failed to notice the extra two pairs of footwear. 

 

"Hey Akaashi, this Saturday there's the-" Kenma looks up and paused. His eyes widened as he took in his surroundings. 

 

Akaashi looked red from anger despite the fact he looked close to crying. 

 

And..

 

Bokuto and Kuroo. 

 

 

_of course. everything makes so much sense now._

 

It was like walking into a heated argument. Heck it probably was what had really just transpired.

Bokuto opened his mouth to say something but Kenma shut his eyes and raised his hands. 

 

"Nope, I'm not even going to ask. Enjoy your time." 

 

He made a beeline to his room and closed the door. He plopped into his bed with a defeated sigh. 

 

Kenma isn't mentally ready for this.

 

...

 

The distance between them shrinks a little. Only a little though. 

 

* * *

 

 

"Bro, I swear I thought I saw Akaashi for a minute." Bokuto states out loud after the rigorous match against China. 

Kuroo looks over. 

 

"You must be imagining it." Kuroo replies back. "He can't be all the way in China." 

 

Bokuto flashes him a fake smile. 

 

"You're right." Bokuto paused and stared at the volleyball in his hands. "It's impossible." 

 

Come to think of it, Kuroo did see a flash of familiar fake blond hair. 

              

_maybe.._

 

_...nah_

 

* * *

 

Days after the awkward encounter Kuroo catches Kenma outside the coffee shop. 

 

"Kenma!" 

 

The way he calls his name is so annoyingly familiar. It rolls of Kuroo's tongue so perfectly.

Kenma walks faster, keeping his head down and stuffs his nimble hands into his pocket. 

 

"Kenma!" 

 

There it is again. 

Kenma starts running. 

 

"OI!" 

 

Curse his small legs and curse Kuroo's long ones. 

 

Kuroo grabs his hand and Kenma jumps, wide-eyed as he turns around. 

 

The cars are noisy, the wind is loud against their ears. Crusty orange leaves whirled around in a circle like a small tornado sweeping the concrete ground, the mystifying colours of the sun shone onto the pile of leaves glistening brightly. 

 

And Kenma gazes into his half-lidded eyes. 

 

Everything surrounding them stopped.

 

(The distance between them has never been this small before. A hair-breadth maybe.) 

 

* * *

 

 

"Bokuto and Akaashi are getting cosy huh?" Kuroo wonders as looked down at the blonde boy. 

 

It's nighttime and he can only see a silhouette of the two ahead of them

 

Kenma nodded, his eyes glued to his handheld device. 

 

"They should, they deserve it." Kenma replies, as he thinks about how heartbroken Akaashi has been for the years he waited for Bokuto. And as he looks over at the embracing couple Kenma smiles. 

 

"They're going to be ok." 

 

Kuroo grins. 

Kenma see's his eyes in the moonlight. 

 

And his gaze drifted to his lips. 

 

_And the distance between them is nonexistent._

 

... 

 

_Kenma is always two steps behind Kuroo._

_Kuroo making a path and leads him towards life, acting as_ Kenma's _personal guide. It's been like this since as long as Kenma can remember._

_There are times he catches up as Kuroo slows down a tiny bit._

_But of course, times he can't see him at all._

 

_And now, he realises that all these times.. Kuroo will always be there, waiting for him._

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> bleh ugh sorry about this. I don't really understand myself either.


End file.
